Just to see you smile
I went to the temple the other night with friends. I stood in front of it looking at it. Then a picture popped into my mind of Jesse and Jaymie walking out of it with their little girl after her being...
View ArticleCry Baby Lindsey
I wish people could understand how I am feeling. It's so annoying having these moments where there is so much pain and then I start to cry. I wish they could understand. I am going through HELL right...
View ArticleTomorrow
Tomorrow is a day of happiness and sorrow all in one. Tomorrow Henslee will officially be Henslee L Maughan. It hurts, but is dim because of the joy I feel for her to have a mom and dad. She is so...
View ArticleSome new pictures :)
The court date went well. Everything went fast and was fine. I got to meet a lot more of Henslee's cousins and family. I will get to meet even more on Saturday. I can't wait. But I can wait for the...
View ArticleRANDOM thoughts
Saturday went well.. Everything is final. It is a numb empty feeling that I can't explain. It feels like I can't ever see her again. It's so weird. I know I can but I feel like I have no say on...
View Article7 months
Today Henslee is 7 months. She is getting so big and time has just flown right out the window. She is in Utah with her family and is just so happy to be up there. I got a picture of her today which I...
View ArticleI LOVE YOU HENSLEE
This past weekend I got really sick so today I took work off to relax and get better. I never take work off. It's been a god morning. Woke up about nine and I'm still sitting in bed :). I have been...
View ArticleLIFE IS HAPPENING AGAIN
I miss Henslee, but am moving on. I feel that as time goes on my sorrow becomes less. My hole gets smaller. Things are happening for me!! I have a ton of amazing options in my life and am so excited to...
View Article28 hours!
I GET TO SEE HER IN 28 hours from right now!!!!!! I am the most excited person in the world!!!! She makes me so happy and seeing her makes my life so much brighter and wonderful!!!
View ArticleSO HAPPY
It's been a while since I have posted. I have been super busy with a ton of work and stuff. This week has been awesome!! I got to see Henslee TWICE this past week!!! I called her parents on Wed. after...
View ArticleAugust 11
This blog has helped me clear my head a ton through this process. I think that I will probably write less and less now that my life is moving in a different direction. I honestly can say I never...
View Articlebenefits!
I am so gratefull for my open adoption!!!! This past week has been amazing!! I drove up to Utah with my boyfriend and one of the nights we stayed in Logan (Nibbley) with Henslee's gradparents! They are...
View ArticleForever Friends
So I am so in love with this guy and I am so blessed to have met him. I honestly think that it was because of the fact that I placed Henslee that he came into my life. I can't believe that it hasn't...
View ArticleALMOST A YEAR!
Henslee is a year in less then 2 weeks!!! It's crazy to think how fast time flies! She can crawl now and is so cute!! I miss her so much but am so happy she has the GREATEST parents EVER!! I love Jesse...
View ArticleLife after a change!!
I know I stopped writing on the blog because I said that I've moved on in my life and most of my healing was over and then I started a new blog of Jared (my husband) and I's life together. But I do...
View Article4th of July
This is Henslee with her new baby brother Nixon who id my best friends birth son. I'm so glad she has a little brother now :)Henslee has been in Utah since the end of June which has been so sad for me...
View Articlei love you little one
Dear Henslee,I have so many unpublished posts on here I didn't want people to see. I might not even publish this. Depends what comes from my brain tonight. I love you more then words can say. I miss...
View ArticlePictures!
My birthday visit back in may. We got some professional ones done a few weeks ago but I dont have them yet. soon :)
View ArticleI never left her!
Tonight I am crying. Tonight I am sad! Today 3 years ago I signed the papers to place my beautiful little girl for adoption. Every day since has been a struggle. I am a mother who is grieving. People...
View ArticleMarch 15, 2013
I decided I wanted to write a small example of how many times a day I think about my princess.Yesterday: I woke up and saw her picture sitting on the desk as I left. Got in the car and headed to work....
View Articleyou are there and i am here
I miss you Princess! You are my hero and best friend! I love you and hope all is well. You just keep smiling and I will always be here for you!Love, your guardian angel
View ArticleI am a Birthmom
I am a birthmom. Many people don't know this about me because it's not something I go around sharing with everyone. I wish I could though because to me talking about Henslee (my daughter) is my most...
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